At the risk of sounding like a total snob...I have to share what I have experienced in the last 24 hours. A friend told me about this site, Plenty of Fish. It is an online dating site. Out of curiosity I decided to check it out and was, within 24 hours, flooded with about 8 million emails from single men in the area claiming to be "the one". I decided to create a little Do and Don't list for any men thinking about creating a profile and/or emailing women on these sites....(this is from DIRECT experience)
1. Try not to use the words "holla at" more than once or twice. It doesn't take that much more time to type "get in touch with me."
2. Don't use the online name "BIG GUNS".
3. "Is 23 too young to just have fun with?"....UM YES.
4. If you are in jail you might want to make sure your picture doesn't CLEARLY display such.
5. Don't create an account where all of your pictures make you look like Ozzy Osbourne's long lost twin.
6. Let's just go ahead and create the rule now...more than 2 pictures of you posing with a dead animal is more than 2 too many.
7. Do NOT post an "application to date me".
8. Try not to chew someone out on your second email to them over the fact that they didn't reply to your first email....and if you are going to do so maybe wait longer than 15 minutes to do that.
9. Do be accepting of "big" women if you openly admit that you are a "big" man...."I'm a big man but don't want no big woman!"
10. Avoid your first contact being a description of your fantasy of the woman being abducted, bound, and gagged with you getting to the "hideout" just in time to save her, remove the duct tape, and passionately kiss her. Ummmm...no.
11. Don't openly admit to (and be proud of) the fact that you are wasted in your profile picture.
12. Don't tell a mother of 4 that you are into your body and weight lifting and that she had better be into "lookin' damn good".
13. Do post a picture. Unfortunately it does matter.
14. Don't email a single, white, mother who claims to be a preschool teacher when you are so obviously a gang member.
15. Look at the age. If she is 32 and you are over 60...maybe not. Go check out a different type of website called sugardaddy.com.....or flat out state what you have to offer! LOL
16. Don't FLAT OUT SAY that you are married and looking to cheat. Duh.
17. Take off your "redneck" hat for your profile pic.
18. And your Nascar shirt.
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1 comments:
now thats the gal i remember...thats some funny as shit. :)
from the stalking ex that still reads your blog. :)
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